Free the Nipple in New Hampshire

Lawmakers went on the attack-

Writing “topless” laws that the state lacked

“We must take a stand!

But as proof we demand

To see photos of gals in the act!”

.

Icicle

because Winter won't go away....

Old Man Winter knows sex is my vice.
He hissed, “What I’ve got here is nice!”
Though it was long and rigid,
The sight turned me frigid-
His boner was made out of ice!
.

Winter Love

I grabbed my love,

Brushed off the snow,

I said, “My dear, the fire’s aglow...

So toasty warm 

That I don’t suppose

You’d mind if I took off 

Some of your clothes...

‘Cause it makes me hot

When the temperature drops

When the brandy flows

And the fireplace glows.

Tender touches and kisses

Fulfilling my wishes

Warm winter love

Melting the snow.

We’ll start with your coat

And then begin

Through the layers

...There, finally!  Your kissable skin!

Then further on down

‘Cause after you’re kiss’d

I’ll unwrap the present

That’s first on my list...

‘Cause it makes me hot

When the temperature drops

When the brandy flows

And the fireplace glows.

Tender touches and kisses

Fulfilling my wishes

Warm winter love

Melting the snow.

Spring fever’s fine

And you already know

That summer love 

Leaves me all aglow,

But I’d trade each one

For my Winter Desire

Cold winds

Deep snow

And love by the fire.

‘Cause it makes me hot

When the temperature drops

When the brandy flows

And the fireplace glows.

Tender touches and kisses

Fulfilling my wishes

Warm winter love

Melting the snow.

.

Valentine

Incandescent
Shut your eyes
Candle light
Will catalyze...

Table set,
Dress allure,
Silk and lace
Will tempt, I’m sure.

Rekindle...
Leave the day behind,
Bet you can’t guess
What’s on my mind-

I smile and promise
That it won’t hurt
A lovely dinner...
With you for dessert! 
.

The Fling

In case of emergency,
Break routine.

Now you’ve done it.
You’ve turned on the Siren.

One finger beckons
Red nail glistens.

“Come here, my dear,
And face the consequences.”
.

Wager

I buy a $1 lottery scratch ticket once in a while.

(it’s sort of like a quickie, gambling-wise).

Today I won $15.

(that’s sort of like a double orgasm, in $1 scratch card terms).

If you don’t sin big
You don’t win big

But you don’t lose everything
Either.
.

Summer Love

I grabbed my love one summer day
When I was feeling.... how should I say?
Well... frisky, but in an adventurous way,
I said, “Nocturnal is nice, but routine,
“Why not try daylight, surrounded by green?
“Look, it’s sunny and warm, imagine our luck,
“Let’s find a place outside where we’ll...

Fulfill our sweet dreams
In a bower of green,
To the soft melodies
Of the birds and the bees,
Our naked desire is all we require;
Sweet pleasure found under the trees.

Here in the woods most people like
To take a picnic or a hike,
But we don’t need boots or a basket of food,
Just fresh air and sunshine to set the mood;
A bed of ferns, a soft caress
Some tender touches to undress
Our love-life in a rut was stuck
But now we just can’t wait to...

Fulfill our sweet dreams
In a bower of green,
To the soft melodies
Of the birds and the bees,
Our naked desire is all we require;
Sweet pleasure found under the trees.

And though al fresco makes me smile,
The conditions are perfect just once in a while;
In the winter it snows,
In the spring- mosquitoes!
And in mud season, puddles and muck;
But it’s worth the wait
‘Cause I’d really hate
To miss such a chance to...

Fulfill our sweet dreams
In a bower of green,
To the soft melodies
Of the birds and the bees,
Our naked desire is all we require;
Sweet pleasure found under the trees.
.

Pre-Lover

One day a friend of mine and I were discussing sex scandals over a cup of coffee recently.  You know- Woods, Edwards, Sanford, etc, etc.  We speculated that the next rage would be ‘pre-lover’ agreements- pre-conceived legal contracts that might help lead these transgressors out of the trackless land of infidelity and scandal with dignity.  We laughed, and I said if nothing else the idea might give me a notion for a poem or story.  Here it is, folks.  A story set to poem, from the point of view of the male half of the equation...

You’ve only just let down your hair,
Stripped down to sexy underwear,
In Motel Cheap that’s not too far
From where we met at Downtown Bar
In turn not far from where I slipped
Away from my tedious Business Trip...

You’re lookin’ fine- you can bet I’ll be fast,
But, honey, I’ve learned from experience past
That though a fling can be a blast
We must first our expectations cast...

That’s right- on paper, draw it up
Somewhat akin to a wedding pre-nup.
I’ve got the forms here in a stack-
Right next to my Trojans pack.

It says, “I, _______” What was your name, dear?
“Promise to faithfully heed and adhere
To the rules and restrictions outlined within...”
This is serious,  dear!  Wipe off that grin!

See, first you swear you’ve got no STDs,
Just initial next to that paragraph, please.

Page Two is all about how you’ll deny
You know me if ever my wife were to try
To find out what really goes on when I say
I’m lonely and chaste while I’m away.

And of course you’ll agree not to talk to the press,
As that would result in a terrible mess.

And then, my dear, as you see- there’s more...
Perfunctory stuff, but on Page Four
You’ll note- now don’t think this is sleazy,
But I’ve listed techniques (with illustrations) that please me.

And then- last page- to end it all
It says you’ll be ready when I call
To glam it up with heels and gown
The next time I return to town...

Hey, honey, now, don’t shake your fist!
They tell me I’m impossible to resist.
You won’t let a little bit of paper be comin’
‘Tween you and me and some hot, heavy  lovin’...

Will you?

SLAM!
.

Maine Madam

I recently talked to a friend of mine from Kennebunk, Maine who (as a former selectman) has his finger on the pulse of the town, including the rumor mill. Rumor has it, he explained to me, that a local Zumba fitness studio was recently shut down by law enforcement because the establishment was a cover for prostitution. Rumor further has it that no official news has been released about the bust because it might hurt the reputation of certain well connected local men... All of which seemed to me the stuff of which wicked limericks are made...

That Kennebunk Zumba Madam-
If you wanted the moves, she had ‘em.
Now the gents that she laid
Will feel betrayed
When the cops throw her black book at ‘em!
.

Mer

Mer I

“Anchors away!” exclaims Garnet happily, radiating delight at the sunshine, salt spray, and lively, cheerful company. “...or is it anchors aweigh?” she puzzles, “No matter... off we go!”

Garnet quickly picks a prime spot on deck of the elegant yacht-sized sailboat, and, pulling a jumbo sized beach towel out of her bag, while at the same time stowing her terry-cloth cover-up into the bag, lays down with a contented smile to sun her bikini-clad self.

“Oh!” she exclaims, as she almost reaches the moment of recumbent relaxation, “One more thing...” She digs into her bag an pulls out her cell phone, quickly dials, and in no time is engaged in cheerful chatting.

“Captain R.! Oh, Captain!...” Garnet calls, holding the cell phone in one hand, and beckoning to him with the other, “My mermaid BFF, Coral Rose, has invited us to a party tonight! Here...” she thrusts the phone into the hand of the puzzled captain, “She’s going to give you the coordinates...”

At a loss of what else to do, Captain R. obediently takes the phone & holds it to his ear. A look of confusion spreads over his face as he glances helplessly at Garnet and says, “Um... all I hear are... bubbling, gurgling noises.”

“Oh silly me.” exclaims Garnet, “I forgot. You don’t speak Mer!” quickly grabbing the phone back, she addresses her Mer BFF, saying, “Coral, honey, you better text it, OK?” before handing it back to the hapless captian.

Confusion turns to surprise as Captain R. sees coordinates scroll across the tiny screen...


Mer II

The stars shown bright, & phosphorescence twinkled in the ocean waves as if in imitation of those heavenly bodies. Between these two magic mediums of water and space floated a handsome craft named The Happy Deviant...

Early in the evening the noble ship had arrived at its programmed coordinates, slowing to a stop as silvery green tails flashed and upstretched arms signaled “Welcome!”

The events that followed raced by in a delightful blur of exotic merriment and amazing entertainment...

...platters of undersea delicacies delivered by laughing mermaids and hoisted to the deck by an enthusiastic Garnet... a never ending supply of drink bubbles, which, when pierced by a special straw, delivered serious refreshment and light intoxication...

Dolphin races... a juggling octopus... and synchronized swimming by Team Mermaid which would put any Olympic counterpart to shame...

In the wake of this amazing spectacle, the crew of the Happy Deviant reveled in the magic of their new-found paradise, while Garnet, leaning close over the water, chatted and giggled with her Merfriends.

“C’mon, Garnet!” Captain R. overheard, as bits & pieces of the twittering conversation floated his way, “You’ve GOT to meet him! There’s a get-together tonight at Marina’s place...”

“OK.” said Garnet decisively, “But I must return by sunrise...”

SNAP went the clasp of Garnet’s top as it dropped to the deck of the Happy Deviant... Suddenly her top was bare, and her bottom was... scaly? ...and blue-green shimmery.... changing shape, and with the last of her toes Garnet sprang into the water with a beautiful arc, and dove into the waves with a flick of her new-formed tail.

Giggles and giggle-bubbles exploded as Garnet waved good-bye to the Happy Deviant and her crew... “Don’t go anywhere!” she shouted with a wave, “I’ll be back by sunrise!”

In an instant the beautiful swimmers were gone, and all was quiet under the shimmering stars...

Mer III

And a beautiful sunrise it is. Blue melts into pink melts into red as sky melts into water...

Splash! Garnet (tail turned back to legs, scales into skin) drips herself on to the deck of The Happy Deviant. Quickly grabbing her beach towel, she envelops herself and proceeds to coax the water out of her ears by tapping the side of her head with the heal of her palm.

“Mornin’ Captain!” she chirps, upon seeing Captain R. emerge onto the deck, rubbing his sleepy eyes, “Wasn’t it the most wonderful...”

Garnet’s enthusiasm is interrupted by the ringing of her cell phone, which she quickly retrieves from her bag. A cloud comes over her face as she listens intently.

“But I didn’t even have any knees last night!” she says defensively. Holding the device away from her mouth and glancing at Captain R., she explains, “It’s Carla, my alter ego. She says that it being Holy Week, I should be on my knees praying rather than cavorting with underwater heathens!”

“And they’re NOT heathens!” she scolds into the mouthpiece of her cell, “But, OK...” she continues with a sigh, “I’ll be back in time for Holy Thursday Mass.” Rolling her eyes, she snaps the phone closed.

“Guess I’ve got to get off at the next port...” she sighs to Captain R., “But...” she continues with a mischievous smile, “Don’t hurry, OK?”
.

Bare

No one told me about it.

Not my mother.

Not fashion magazines...

And it took me nearly 50 years to figure out that

Bare shoulders are THE BOMB when it comes to garnering second glances!

Maybe it’s just my bare shoulders

Hair up, long neck

Just me

My secret.

Shhhh.... don’t tell the fashion magazines!
.

Sixty Nine

The Sexagenarian was said
To celebrate birthdays in bed.
That was all fine
'Till she turned 69
With a party that'd make you blush red!
.

*Licks Lips*

A toothsome repast.

Don’t know what that is?

Better look it up, baby.

‘Cause you’re gonna be one!

*giggle*

Stripper Workout

"She wraps her hands around that pole
She licks those lips and off we go
And she takes it off nice and slow
'Cause that's Porn Star Dancin'!"

"Uh..." I said, waving my hand to get the attention of my oblivious alter ego as I entered her Salon. Garnet seemed, at the moment, to be enraptured not only by the music, but by whatever she was typing on the computer. "Turn down the stereo a little?" I requested.

"Oh!" Garnet exclaimed, "You're here." She waved a finger in the air, and in an instant the volume dropped dramatically.

"How did you do that?" I queried, wrinkling my brows in puzzlement.

"Magic." Garnet replied with a smile. "Actually, it's new technology. Same thing, right?" she laughed.

"What's with the stripper music?" I asked, "And what are you typing? A novel? You must have some sort of new project going now that your survey is finished."

"It's 'Porn Star Dancing' by a group called My Darkest Days. The music, I mean. You should know." she pointed out, "I found it in your music library. Anyway, I'm working on a resume."

"A resume?" I puzzled, "We haven't lost our job yet, you know. And I haven't quit, though must admit I'm tempted from time to time..."

"I'm not talking about our day job..." Garnet explained, "I'm thinking about a night job." she grinned.

"Uh, oh." I said, "This oughta be good..."

"You've heard about the strip, uh, I mean Gentleman's Club, the proposal for which is making news in nearby Eliot, Maine, right? You know, all the church ladies and mothers of young innocent, impressionable children haranguing the selectmen to quickly pass moratoriums and ordinances banning such unholy establishments before they can manage to open their doors..."

"Yeah, I heard of that." I said, "In fact, there was an article in the paper about it yesterday."

"Right." said Garnet, pulling from her desk a copy of the Foster's Daily Democrat in question, "And the club owner has filed suit. Listen to this. He says..." Garnet picked up the paper and leafed through the A section, "... right here he says, ‘...that the human body is a thing of beauty, which, when combined with music and rhythmic motion in the form of dance, conveys an important message of eroticism.’"

I laughed. "That's quite some spin!" I exclaimed.

"Wait, there's more..." my alter ego insisted, "it says ‘The activity that would occur at the club, the lawsuit states, "enhances individuals' conscious ability to assimilate and consider various issues involving sexual candor and the interest in human sexuality that all human beings have to a great or lesser degree.'"

"But..." I said.

"Isn't that beautiful?" Garnet rhapsodized, "Isn't that a beautiful defense of our beautiful bodies? Almost like poetry!"

"Very clever indeed." I stated, "But what does it have to do with your resume project?"

"Don't you see?" Garnet exclaimed, "I want to apply! To be a dancer!" She hopped to her feet and twirled a pirouette right in front of me.

I sat in her chair and peered at her nascent resume.

"We're not 37, you know. What makes you think you can get away with a lie like that?" I scolded.

"It's not a lie." Garnet insisted, "You read the results of that research project- the one which demonstrated that people who exercise for one hour each day have bodies which (by some biochemical marker or another) are 11 years younger than their chronological age. So we're 37!

"And you can't dance." I stated.

"You can't dance." she retorted. "You've got your weights and your hula hoop for exercise, but I've got this!

Garnet reached for a remote and pointed it at her big screen TV. The title 'Stripper Workout' appeared, accompanied by dance music. She clicked it off again.

"You should try it." she said, "Fun and sexy, and really tightens the buns." she added as she slapped herself on her backside and laughed.

"So you think the Gentlemen and the courts are going to prevail over the Church Ladies and the Upstanding Citizens?"

"Gentlemen can be upstanding as well, you know." she said, giggling at her own double entendre, "But yes, I'm betting on the gentlemen. Now, back to my resume..."

Garnet once again twirled a finger in the air, and as I exited her salon I was treated to another verse of her current fav song...

"She don't play nice
She makes me beg
As she drops that dress around her legs
And I'm sittin' right by the stage
'Cause it's Porn Star Dancin'
.

Garnet, Philosopher

"See, it says here," stated Garnet, opening her paperback entitled The Big Questions: A Short Introduction to Philosophy, "'...philosophical writing should be somewhat entertaining, witty, dramatic, and even seductive.' I think..." she exclaimed excitedly, "That I could be a philosopher!"

"You haven't even finished the book." said Carla dismissively, "How could you be a philosopher already?"

"Well," explained Carla's irrepressible alter ego, "Aside from being entertaining, witty, dramatic, and even seductive...." she smiled, "A sound philosophy of life is a lot simpler than this esteemed author lets on."

"How so?" asked Carla dubiously, "Seems to me to be a very complicated topic, with legions of subtopics."

"No." Garnet shook her head, "Not at all. Every single sentence of this book and every phrase of philosophy that's ever been written can be trumped by one word." she concluded smugly.

"Which is?" Carla couldn't help but ask.

"Love. L-O-V-E, love. Love is the concept. Love is the conceptual framework. Love is the logic. Love is the argument. Love is truth. It's like that Maurice Sendak book where the queen served spaghetti for the salad, spaghetti for the appetizer, spaghetti for the main dish, and spaghetti for dessert- except it's Love and Philosophy instead of spaghetti and menus."

"Spaghetti?" Carla puzzled, "But... Love can't be a philosophy... philosophy can't be love... Love is a good thing, surely, but not good enough- in and of itself- to be a philosophy..." Carla mused.

"If it's good enough for God, it's good enough for me." Garnet declared. "You see, Jesus said, in answer to the question as to which of the commandments is the greatest, 'You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and the first commandment. The second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. The whole law and the prophets depend on these two commandments.'"

"And besides," she continued, "The proof is in the word itself. Philosophy. It starts with love. Therefore it must end with love. All those dead philosophers and their dry esoteric ideas and their ponderous tomes are dust or gathering dust. But Love is alive! Love has survived! People UNDERSTAND love. People live love!"

"Yes," Carla said doubtfully, "But if a real philosopher were to appear and come at you and your Fantasy Love Philosophy with rules of inference, axioms, deductive logic, inductive logic, syllogisms and catagorical syllogisms, would your 'philosophy' stand? What would you do to defend your ethereal ideas against the onslaught of our Fine Philosopher Friend?" I laughed.

"Easy." Garnet declared with a smile, "I would simply love him. Inevitably he would shut up, and I (and Love) would win by default."
.

Sensuous Sweets

You swear your love;
Flowers and card,
But the candy I like
Is soft, then hard....

So come here, my sweet.

The flavor’s mine,
The pleasure’s yours...

Love springs
To the tip of my tongue
More eloquent
Than verse.
.

The Seduction Kit

*This is a sequel, dear reader, to 11/12/2010's The Survey*

She was up to something. I just knew it.

My alter ego had sent me an e-mail just that morning... the kind with a magic link, and a rather cryptic message to go along with it. Something about salon-sitting...

I clicked. Of course. I held my breath and closed my eyes, giving in to the dizzy scrambling sensation of 'the web abductor,' as my alter-ego refers to this unconventional (to say the least) mode of transportation. When I opened my eyes I saw... luggage. "What's this?" I wondered aloud, "Have I been accidentally transported to the baggage claim area of the Portland Jetport?" I rubbed my eyes.

"No, silly." Garnet scolded, "I'm taking a trip."

Having regained balance and focus, I looked her up and down. She was wearing a straight, dark red skirt and matching, tailored blazer. On her head was perched a little pillbox hat, attached to which was a bit of veil which covered her forehead and eyebrows in a way that I had to admit was fetching, in a retro fashion.

"Back in time?" I responded with laugh. "What's with the last century look?"

"It's a traveling suit." Garnet sniffed, "And if you ever bothered to check the fashion pages once in a while, you'd know they're 'in!' "

"Be that as it may." I scoffed, and then, my query turning serious I asked, "Where are you going? Really?"

"I'm taking my Survey on the road." she explained. "I can only get so far with the internet/Salon connection. After a while the same gents keep clicking, hoping for a follow-up. So I've taken down the link, and I'm taking to the road." she declared.

"Sounds like fun." I said sceptically, "But why all the baggage? You know airlines charge extra these days..."

"Daywear, eveningwear, makeup, lingere..." she counted on her fingers, "I've got to look good you know. How will I get any seduction done if I don't look good? And then there are these..." Garnet gestured to a suitcase filled with what appeared to be identical navy blue cosmetic cases.

"What are those?" I puzzled.

Garnet smiled, "Why, 'Seduction Kits,' of course. I don't leave home without them, you know." she giggled.

"But what..." I pondered, "Whatever do you put in a Seduction Kit?" Unable to contain my curiosity, I picked one up and un-did the zipper. I reached inside and brought out the first item that came to my fingertips. A little bottle.

"Brandy?" I glanced at my alter-ego, "For you or him?" I smirked.

"Him, of course." she stated, "I keep my supply in my purse. Some of the kits contain an equivalent nip of whiskey, in case that's what my victim- uh, I mean interviewee- prefers. Some even contain little bottles of vodka. The fruit flavored kind. They're not half bad, you know."

"You're a lush, you know." I teased, "What else is in here?" Garnet continued to pack while I rummaged through the little bag...

"Flowers?" I shot her a puzzled look as I pulled out a dried, scented bundle of sprigs, tied with a blue ribbon, "What sex are you seducing, after all?" I laughed.

"It's lavender." she stated, "You read that article, too, didn't you? The one about the scientific study that measured which scents caused an increase in blood flow to the genitals of the males that did the sniffing. Testing the theory of perfume, they were. Lavender and Pumpkin Pie were the most efficacious scents in that sense..." she smiled at her unintentionally humorous homonyms, "...and since I can't fit a pumpkin pie into the kit..." she giggled.

"Hm..." I said, glancing into the bag, "No, um, prophylactics? I know the baby factory is closed..." I looked at her seriously, "But there are a lot of diseases out there, you know." I stated sternly.

"This is a SEDUCTION kit!" she shot back at me, "Including a condom doesn't say, 'I wanna seduce you, you sexy thing,' it says, 'I wanna hop into the sack with you even though you're most probably as filthy as the nearest toilet seat in this dive.'" she sniffed, "The condoms" she stated, "are in my purse."

Back to the kit. "Chocolate... " I pulled out the foil-covered morsal, and then...

"WHAT'S THIS?" I screamed in shock, pulling a little home-made-cigarette-like thingy from the bag.

"It's a joint, of course. Chill out. They're almost legal almost everywhere these days. One of my Salon victims, uh, I mean guests, clued me in on them a while ago. Said it really ramps up his desire. So I put it to the test, and turns out to be quite efficacious. Don't look at me like that! I don't use it! It's strictly to put the interviewees in the mood."

"But..." I said, "Where do you get it? Isn't it risky to buy the stuff?"

"No." she smiled, "I grow it. In my herbarium. Same place I get the lavender. That's why I summoned you here. I need you to water my plants while I'm away."

"Herbarium?" I gasped, "I didn't know you had an herbarium... Where is...?"

"Fifth door on the left." she pointed through the arched doorway that led to the hall of doors, "And don't forget to leave the light on. And check the temperature every day. Clipboard with the log hanging on the wall." she concluded, as she hoisted the last of her suitcases up to the web abductor.

"Ah." she smiled, smoothing out her skirt and straightening her hat, "Adventure awaits!"

"Bon voyage!" I sang as my alter ego disappeared, "Hey! You forgot this!" I waved the Seduction Kit which I still held in my hand, but it was too late.

Whatever am I going to do with a Seduction Kit? Hmmmm.....
.

Evil Seductress (prose version)

Oh, yeah- me an Evil Seductress. I can just see it: Carla, modest, soft-spoken professional by day, Evil Seductress by night. *laughs*

I’m not. But, y’know I could be... And most people know it, too. She’s a clever escape artist, my alter-ego is. I try to keep her under lock and key, but she’s... well, she’s not only evil, she’s magic. Restraints are of little use.

And yes, yes, she’s a bona fide Evil Seductress. We shall call her Garnet. Garnet and Carla inhabit the same body. The sensible and well-behaved Carla is at the wheel most of the time, but Garnet is an effective back-seat driver.

I’m alone in the house right now.... so I think it’s safe... *sound of key turning, rusty hinges creaking*

“I’ve had a request...” says Carla.

“And you’re actually giving in to it?” Garnet perks up at the prospect of Carla considering some sort of temptation.

“Well, it’s basically harmless.” Carla replies.

Garnet smiles with anticipation. ‘It’s basically harmless’ means the door is wide open.

“I just want you to write something on the subject of Seduction, that’s all.” says Carla, trying to dampen Garnet’s obvious enthusiasm, “Who better than an Evil Seductress to expound on that theme?”

“Ok.” says Garnet. “Let me at it. Go take a nap, or polish your sensible shoes or something. Shoo!”

“Ah, seduction!” Garnet hisses gleefully, rubs her hands together, and sits down at the computer.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*Garnet types excitedly, producing the following missive:*

"She never lets me have any fun. For instance, we agree to splurge on a new dress from Victoria’s Secret (my favorite catalog), and we look fantastic in it, but Carla doesn’t want to wear it because she thinks it makes her look too good! Imagine that! Other women our age would kill to look like that, and she wants to hide it! *snorts derisively*

And don’t even get me started on make-up. Always going for that ‘natural’ look. Heaven forbid that we would go for the ‘sexy’ look! *rolls eyes*

But... oh... yeah, Seduction. Hmm.. where should I start? All of this is fantasy, of course, because Carla would never really let me seduce anyone. And since it’s a fantasy, I suppose I can use my magic....

I’ll start by selecting a victim. Hmm... lots of potential victims. Young ones, like those teenage boys who stare at us when they come with their mother to the pharmacy. What is it with them? They must not think I notice. Or maybe they’re hoping I do. Yeah, I could go for one of those...

Then there are the men who give me that smitten look. They’re older than the teenagers, but usually younger than me. It’s not a crass look, such as the leer a man might give to a woman with large breasts, but more of a worshipful look. A “Wow!” look. Like that guy in my poem “Crowded Sidewalk.” Or the guitar player at the Open Mic a few days ago. They’d be easy prey. They’re already half-way there...

Internet victims would be easy. Almost too easy. Carla doesn’t know it, but I sneak seduction into her writing. She tries to tone it down, but it doesn’t work. Makes it all the more alluring, actually. *smiles*

Ok, a victim. It doesn’t matter. Any one of the above. Or better yet, we’ll do them all. One at a time, of course... but for now let’s pretend it’s you.

It’s evening. A quiet, sophisticated lounge somewhere. I, the Evil Seductress await you. Sexy. Stunning. Of course. I said I’d meet you, and here I am, sipping tonic water. Ah, there you are, baby. Come give me a hug. You’ve never been hugged by an Evil Seductress before, have you? Don’t be nervous.

Let me order you a drink. I like my prey to be relaxed. You’ll find it’s easier that way.

Talk to me. Talking is easy, once you get going. I’m a good listener. I make you smile, I make you laugh. I make you feel comfortable. Alcohol gives you a push, and you’re falling...

C’mon, look at me. No resistance. Good. In my eyes you see everything that I am. I am beautiful and nurturing. I am humorous and light-hearted. I am tantalizing.... yeah, baby, reach for my hand, just like that.

But don’t stop talking... I want to know all about you. It feels good. Just to talk. Just to look into my eyes. Succumb to desire... that’s what I want... but I don’t betray my intentions yet.

It’s time to go. Getting late. Walking out. Yeah, baby, put your arm around me, just like that. Take me home. Come inside. I pretend you’re going to leave. I know you’re not.

A kiss ‘good night.’ Mmm... hug me tight, touch me. That's it... bare skin...

Kisses, warm and hard.

“Wanna stay?” I whisper. Of course you do. You can’t resist the Evil Seductress."

______________________________________________________________________

“Ok, Garnet, that’s enough.”

“But I was just getting to the good part!”

“Enough is enough. Back inside” *clank of door slamming, key turning.*

“You never let me have any fun!”
.

I'm Frozen. I Need...

Hot Cocoa
With a splash
Of Brandy.

Sex
With a splash
Of giggles,

And nibbles,
And tickles,
And tongues,

There. What fun.
Defrosted.
.

Winter Love

I grabbed my love,
Brushed off the snow,
I said, “My dear, the fire’s aglow...
So toasty warm
That I don’t suppose
You’d mind if I took off
Some of your clothes...

‘Cause it makes me hot
When the temperature drops
When the brandy flows
And the fireplace glows.
Tender touches and kisses
Fulfilling my wishes
Warm winter love
Melting the snow.

We’ll start with your coat
And then begin
Through the layers
...There, finally! Your kissable skin!
Then further on down
‘Cause after you’re kiss’d
I’ll unwrap the present
That’s first on my list...

‘Cause it makes me hot
When the temperature drops
When the brandy flows
And the fireplace glows.
Tender touches and kisses
Fulfilling my wishes
Warm winter love
Melting the snow.

Spring fever’s fine
And you already know
That summer love
Leaves me all aglow,
But I’d trade each one
For my Winter Desire
Cold winds
Deep snow
And love by the fire.
.